Okay. Fess up. You’ve already broken at least one of your I’m-really-gonna-do-it New Year’s resolutions, haven’t you? Or did you just not pay the calendar any attention and say, “Just because it’s January doesn’t mean I have to change lifelong habits.” Chances are, even if you didn’t commit to anything, you at least thought about a few lifestyle improvement choices. It’s as natural as being a kid and banging a pot with a spoon on your front porch the first time you were allowed to stay up ’til midnight on December 31st. (Thanks, Grandma, for that wonderful memory.)
I imagine you can guess what some of the Top Ten resolutions are for the coming twelve months. Yes, lose weight, as always, occupies the number one position. Followed quickly by exercise more. Make more money/spend less money is high on the list. As are spend more time with family and friends, travel more, read more, drink more water, get organized, and quit smoking. Plus a few others that round out the most mentioned.
Decrease screen time is one our forefathers and mothers really didn’t have to worry about. Ditto the decision to take a social media break. I imagine there were people glued to the new medium of television back in the 1950s, but that can’t hold a candle to today’s screen addicts.
Get more sleep is a goal of many too. And eat better. Yeah, we all know those fruits and especially veggies are much better for us than a bacon cheeseburger, but spinach salad and broccoli just can’t hold a candle to a hunk of grilled cow and French fries.
While there has been a Tweet from the Oval Office about a lifestyle change on the southern border, I haven’t seen the Head Thumbster suggest any personal New Year’s resolutions. There have been reports of other Tweeps weighing in on less controversial issues, however. A few in particular could probably apply to most of us.
One that was obviously posted on January 1stread, “Forget to make resolutions? Just write out everything you did last night, and at the beginning add the word ‘Stop.’” Another kind of summed up the lack of that “eat less” idea with this: “I’d love to say ‘New Year, New Me,’ but I’m only two stamps away from a free meal with my KFC loyalty card. Would be silly to ruin that now.”
Food seems to be a common subject in many tweets. An obvious gourmand wrote, “My New Year’s resolution is to figure out how to squeeze a 4thand 5thmeal into my day.” And I don’t really know what precipitated this one: “Already broke my New Year’s resolution to not cry in a Taco Bell bathroom,” but there seem to some underlying issues that need to be addressed. That same person may well have written, “My resolution is to work on my low self-esteem, but I don’t think I can do it.”
Some Twitter users had pithy thoughts. One wrote, “Startup idea: A gym named Resolution that runs for the 1stmonth of the year, collects subscription fee, then converts to a bar named Regret.” And from another: “My New Year’s resolution is that donuts have no calories.” (Do I hear a loud round of applause for that one?) And there’s one that is really kind of hard for all of us: “My New Year’s resolution is simply to remember to write 2019 instead of 2018.”
Seriously, though, a fresh January does give all of us an opportunity to reflect upon what we might improve about ourselves. Some may think it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect, but that could be a start right there.
I’m thinking that the folks in high places might also benefit from a little introspection. For example, many in Washington could adopt as their resolution, “Just shut up and do your job.” Imagine how much could actually get accomplished if elected officials spent more time on real issues and less on a new adjective to describe the opposition.
Along that line, how about the common sense, “Don’t spend what you don’t have.” Taxpayer dollars always seem to be Monopoly play monies to many solons. News flash: They ain’t. Try being a tightwad with our dough, folks. It might elevate your approval percentage to double digits.
And for corporations that financially shower CEOs and other titled executives, here’s one for you: “Take care of the worker bees.” They’re producing all that honey you’re peddling. Without them, you’ve got an empty hive.
More pipe dreaming. That’s my resolution.
©MMXIX. William J. Lewis, III – Freelance Writer
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