Just in case you missed the memo, Super Bowl LVI will be contested Sunday. Alas, to the great chagrin of avid Atlanta fans, the Falcons will not be joining the Braves as Champions this season. Instead, the LA Rams and the Cincinnati Bengals will be matching up playbooks.

I have to say that while I generally root for the Falcons on any given Sunday afternoon in the fall, my heart lies with the aforementioned Bengals. Growing up in southern Ohio, I was present at the birth of the Cincinnati eleven and have followed their sometimes not-so-glamorous-nor-successful attempts to play the game of football ever since. Twice before the team has been in the Super Bowl, and twice they’ve finished the season as First Loser.

I actually got to attend the 1982 game against San Francisco. It was held at a domed stadium in Pontiac, Michigan. Inside it was supposed to be 72 degrees (it wasn’t . . . we kept our coats on the whole game). But outside, the high that day was 16 – without the wind chill factor. By the time the game was over, it was about 5 degrees and getting chillier by the minute. We had to park literally a mile away from the stadium, and despite being uber-prepared for the cold, we still nearly froze going and coming.

This year should be a little nicer, weather-wise. Los Angeles seldom sees 16 degrees, even in February. I have seen it snow in the San Fernando Valley, but only for about thirty seconds.

The Super Bowl game is just about always the most-watched TV program in any year. Granted, many people tune in to watch the commercials (which historically have often been more entertaining than the game), and everybody takes advantage of the event to load up on high-calorie comfort food and a variety of tasty beverages.

If you’re one of the legions of party planners preparing for a potpourri of palatable provisions and potent potables, I have some suggestions I’ve run across from various locales across the country.

First and foremost, the number one item on the menu will probably be beer. Copious amounts are consumed from sea to shining sea during the game. (Coincidentally, water tables in many metropolises get dangerously low at halftime as the beer flows freely in another way.)

Beef is big in many states. It’s cold in most of the country in February, so a hearty meat stew is welcome. Steak, burgers, barbeque, and meatballs drenched in marinara sauce are usually big hits.

You can’t go wrong with chicken wings. Apparently, over a billion of those taste treats will be consumed before, during, and even after the game. Recipes are all over the board depending on local tastes, but the spicier the better for many aficionados. (Leading in direct proportion to the consumption of the previously mentioned beverage of choice, cold beer.)

Cheese, of course, belongs on every Super Bowl grazing table. In Ohio and other midwestern states (undoubtedly Wisconsin), a cheese ball is expected and welcomed. (Always served with a side of sturdy crackers. Those are required since there’s nothing worse than leaving half your dipping tool stuck inside a delicious concoction of various cheeses.)

Surprisingly, nachos are not the must-have snack you might think. Something about getting soggy if not eaten quickly. Seven-layer dip is big, and pasta is always a crowd-pleaser. A plate of lasagna with bread and butter fills up guests fast and perhaps isn’t as messy as several kinds of dips and chips. Vermonters apparently are big on Chow Mein on gameday as an alternative. And everybody can go for a chocolate chip cookie or two after the meal.

But to be truly authentic this year, especially if you’re pulling for the Bengals, there is one must-have dish required on your halftime menu. And that would be Cincinnati’s famous 5-way chili. Skyline Chili is probably the most famous purveyor of the dish, and here’s the way they serve it:

A steaming plate of spaghetti covered with their secret-recipe chili, diced onions, beans, and topped with a mound of shredded cheddar cheese. For years, native Cincinnatians have washed it all down with a cold Hudepohl Gold or Schoenling Lager beer.

Now, to not leave out L.A., I think Rams’ fans have tofu and kale on rice cakes highlighting their Super Bowl menus. So, your choice.

It’s been a long, long time since Cincinnati has been invited to the Super Bowl. 1989 to be exact. The battle cry then was “Who Dey, Who Dey, Who Dey think gonna beat them Bengals.” And after all this time, neither the chant nor the game day menu have changed. Go Bengals!

 

©MMXXII. William J. Lewis, III – Freelance Writer