How does your wants, wishes, and needs list look this year? Do you have a hankering for the latest PlayStation? A new car? A bigger screen TV? The latest fashion must-haves? Time AWAY from family instead of WITH them after the pandemic closeness of the last many months? Practical or frivolous, we all look forward to opening brightly wrapped presents. I would venture a guess that virtually no one is immune to wanting something special just for themselves. Why, even politicians probably have personal desires to go along with their more public entreaties. For example:
Nancy Pelosi: Silence from the Squad. And to get her hair done in peace. Ms. Pelosi’s had a rough go of it when it comes to opposition from the Left. Who would ever have thought that Nancy would be a moderate, but on her side of the aisle in today’s political world, she almost seems to be. Maybe Santa can arrange to put a muzzle on AOC and her friends. And while he’s granting wishes, surely there’s an elf with a beautician’s license that can break away after the holidays, don a mask, and give the Speaker a private cut and color at her house.
Donald Trump: Recount, recount, recount. Simple as that, Santa. Oh, and rumor has it he also wants Melania to stop saying, “When can we get out of here and go to Mar-a-Lago?” The Washington lifestyle never seemed as if it were her cup of tea, even as she dutifully attended to her tasks, smiled when needed, and did a terrific job of keeping son Baron out of the limelight.
Joe Biden: A job for Hunter . . . without a tax issue. The President-elect says Hunter’s a smart kid. And apparently, he knows a lot about oil. His resume proves that, right? But perhaps it’s time to avoid any hint of impropriety and have Hunter pick up some spending money with a U.S. company. Or the government. As of this writing, the position of Energy Secretary hasn’t been filled in the new Cabinet.
Mitch McConnell: Republican peaches. The Majority Leader would probably be okay with one, but two new Rs in his chamber would be better. 51-49 is a rather thin vote count. 52-48 allows for a rogue Senator to break ranks occasionally. Mitch is fervently hoping Georgia is wrapped in red paper on January 5th.
Kamala Harris: A clear understanding of the 25th Amendment. Not that she’s thinking down the line or anything, but the new Vice President-to-be may very well keep a copy of the succession information handy. You never know when you might need something like that.
Mike Pence: Somebody, somewhere to start a “Pence in ’24” presidential committee. Mike’s been a loyal spear-carrier for four years now. But nobody appears to be touting him as possible presidential timber in 2024. That’s really pretty standard procedure for Veeps if the past is any indication. You put your time in, swallow a little pride, nod your head discreetly in the Rose Garden when necessary, and your reward is a leg up on the next nomination.
Brian Kemp: No more elections in Georgia for two years minimum. Practically every governor is having sleepless nights over what to do about the Wuhan Wahoo. But the resident of the Executive Mansion in Atlanta has also had to contend big time with alleged voter fraud and two extra Senate races. How to fix supposed broken water pipes at a main Election Day polling place doesn’t appear in any job description. Midnight oil is the rule rather than the exception on West Paces Ferry Road.
Kelly Loeffler, David Perdue, Raphael Warnock, and Jon Ossoff: Votes. And lots of them. Probably not much else at all on their combined lists right now.
Anthony Fauci: An end to wearing masks! While technically not a politician, Fauci certainly has commanded more than his share of headlines this year. And if he gets his wish, that means Santa delivers a successful vaccine.
Bernie Sanders: To quote Aretha Franklin, “R-E-S-P-E-C-T.” Bernie’s been a big-time player in the world of Democratic presidential politics for many years now. But his party seems to forget about him post-election. With Biden in office, his possibilities of occupying the White House are pretty much kaput, so perhaps the self-described Democratic-Socialist from Vermont would settle for someone in power at least giving him the time of day.
I guess we’ll eventually see what Santa leaves under the tree. What would be nice, as always, is if Peace on Earth were high on everyone’s list. Or at least Peace in Congress. Shoot, that might even be a better gift than a PlayStation 5.
©MMXX. William J. Lewis, III – Freelance Writer