I don’t know about the rest of you Dads out there, but I know what I want for Father’s Day: A trip to the International Space Station. It seems NASA will soon be offering opportunities to use the ISS facilities. I believe the money-making ploy is aimed primarily at companies that want to, say, film commercials or movies in space, but the agency probably wouldn’t turn down the cash if a private citizen wanted to go. And I do.

Ever since the Original 7 astronauts were introduced to the nation in 1959, I’ve wanted to “leave the surly bonds of Earth” as Leonardo da Vinci said, and rocket into orbit. While many factors worked against me, there were really only two key things that kept me from pursuing my dream of being a space traveler in my youth: One, I really didn’t care for math and science as subjects in school (and apparently those were pretty important subjects to master if you wanted to fly high in the sky); and Two, claustrophobia. Have you seen how tiny those Mercury, Gemini, and Apollo capsules were? NASA probably would have frowned on me panicking and yelling, “Let me out of here,” while traveling at 18,000 MPH 70 miles high.

I think the Space Shuttle vehicles would have afforded me the most comfort. But, as with conventional airplanes, I would have needed an aisle seat. The new private enterprise endeavors (such as Elon Musk’s Space X rocket company and Bigelow Aerospace in Nevada) seem to be offering more creature comforts than the cramped quarters of yore, so I could probably handle that as my conveyance to the ISS.

The basic cost per night at the destination is about $35,000. (Note to my kids: You might want to go together and make this a joint Father’s Day present.) That price gets you use of the space station facilities, including air, water, food, and medical supplies. Transportation, it seems, is an add-on. At last check, I think those entities providing the ride charge about $55 million. (Additional note to my kids: This can be part of my birthday present too.) That’s the ten-day mission price. (Kind of makes the $35K-a-day onboard seem like a bargain, doesn’t it?)

It seems the ISS costs somewhere between $3-4 billion a year to maintain. That’s a healthy chunk of change. And while I’m sure all the experiments that are continually conducted serve to further the cause of humanity in some way, shape, or form, quite honestly it seems as if it’s been a long time since there’s been any major “Tang” moment announced. (Those of a certain age will probably recall drinking that breakfast product because that’s what the astronauts drank in space.)

This venture into commercialization may open up Pandora’s Box of endorsements. NASA has usually frowned on that, although the cat was kind of let out of the bag back in the mid-80s when Astronaut Wally Schirra shilled for Actifed, an antihistamine tablet he claimed helped him in orbit.

But if the space agency really wants to offset maintenance costs, it could go big. Much as companies fork over millions each year to put their names and logos on sports stadiums, for a hefty annual sum it’s conceivable we may one day see “Amazon” or “Google” or “Coca-Cola” emblazoned across the façade of the International Space Station.

There’s even some talk about NASA possibly looking toward adding a commercial module to the ISS configuration. Surely Marriott, Hilton, Holiday Inn, and others are ripe prospects to fund such a venture. I can see the headline now: “Our rooms are out of this world.” Or, “For just 100 million loyalty points, you get a free night in orbit.”

If all goes well, perhaps many additions can be accommodated and more and more transports will become available. In a few short years, cruising to the ISS may well become as commonplace as island-hopping in the Caribbean. Maybe by then the “shore excursions” could include a space walk or a platform from which to hit golf balls a couple thousand miles. Perhaps some company can even figure out how to run a shuttle to the Moon for an up close and personal look-see.

Hmmm. That all sounds like something worth waiting for. Kids, listen up. You’re off the hook this year. I think I’ll wait until at least the spacewalk option becomes available. Until then, a Father’s Day card and a phone call will do just fine. (And maybe something chocolate.)

 

©MMXIX. William J. Lewis, III – Freelance Writer